I went to the park and got kicked off again.. by the same kid. I swear to god im being bullied. anyway im thinking of U and im sure ur sleeping oh so soundly … i had a great time with you last night. I keep rereading our msgs and i go 😄😄🌈🌈 yayyy. I have so much fun with you it makes me wanna cry. I’ll tell you about my day now.. so basically I got up after a bad dream and then I thought about you in bed for awhile and then I took a quick shower and brushed my teeth and stuff. I went to the park after to hang out and I was there for an hour or so listening to music and thinking of our ocs (and you). Then I came home and I got a bunch of mail I was so effing scared but it was my medical stuff and food stamps. 
being an adult is so effing hard. Nonetheless im rolling cigarettes right now and tjinking of you. how gay is this? idk 🙂❓ this is wat i have for you today
Kyaaa I just got back from the park. I got kicked off the swings frowny face…or maybe sad panda. Reading all of this made me really happy and emotional because sometimes I’m afraid that this is nothing to you (because I'm a retard) or rather that I like you more. I know it’s not true but hearing all of this helps me to remember that you love me just as much. In that vulnerability, I hope you know how much I trust you. You don’t even really have to try and impress me because just waking up every day to you makes me honestly astounded. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you. It’s truly something of pietistic descent to me. You make things different for me too, not for other people but just for you. I’m okay with this because you deserve to feel like the only boy in the world (and you are basically just that, the only living one in the world that has my heart anyway :wink
I think I’m more than okay with dying now if it can be with you. Which leads me into my next thought where I thought you’d like to be stuck into this fantasy too, just as you are in my dreams. I had this thought while laying in my bed today about how nice it would be to be around you, in your space. Laying my head on your lap while you draw (and you can get a reference of my sleeping face to make horrific art), or just sleeping together. I’m not someone who likes to be touched a lot but I actually think about it pretty often and I think I’d like it if we hugged or held hands or ya. You know, all of that stuff. Obviously you can initiate it because I’m too shy and weird about these things (if this wasn’t just fantasy..but let’s pretend like we always do, okay?). Also you’re so smart… God is so innately human, found within each other more than an actual being or deity in itself. It’s the beauty in the things you see every single day. It’s the reason you wake up in the morning, or the coffee you drink at breakfast that satiates you for the hour energy-wise. When you believe in something, life will always be worth living–and even in death you can find a sense of true nirvana as long as you have that thing within your reach (looks back at the camera and winks at you). Although I wouldn’t mind dying with you and I think that would be nice at the end of time, I think we have a long while to live and love each other while maintaining our everyday lives. Something about that feels so domestic. I don’t need to own you to “own” you, or have you, and vice versa. Maybe this is the calamity that I’ve spent a really long time searching for. You make my life different, myself different. I’ve never felt so bad over someone’s shortcomings. All I want to do is kiss those horrible things away and make you feel better, make it better for you. Which I’ve described is my feeling of love… so at least you know you’re really in my heart. Also yes we do mog straygabe in every single way. If you told them we genuinely loved one another and didn’t want the other dead they wld.. Kill us both 🙁. I’ll always keep true to my promise to you, I’m yours forever (when i’m good.. I’m very good.. But when I'm bad I'm better.) or like until you want rid of me. I’ll follow you through til the very end. No one could take your place either so there’s no need for jealousy. Speaking of which, you didn’t expand on that last night when I was talking about my own jealousy… I hate to inflict any sort of negative emotions on you but I guess it’s also validating that you can feel that at all about someone like me. Tell me about it sometime (no matter how embarrassing.. Because you love me). Anyways, I look forward to your playlist (also yes to all. Hwanzhu and lets do more yorphil because they remind me of cracked out us when we first met. I love that version of you too… he was so cute looking back on it. Every version of you is to me…) as I make you your gazillionth playlist too. I feel so effing kawaii… i’ve one upped you again hawhawhaw. Send me more stuff on my page too and cuss that person out for me. I wanna see what your brain cooks up because it’s funny … 😏 Of course there's more to add just as I'm about to send it. Onto the cute and funny part........... early I got really upset thinking about having a chinchilla but it could be OUR chinchilla. And we could roleplay fighting over custody. But we have to get two because they could get extremely lonely without one of their kind. So, possible names : Gabe and Dominic II, Paul and Syzmon, Yori and Phil, Hwan and Zhu, so on and so forth. Let me know what other names you're thinking of. Tell me about all your fantasies too I would like to listen and imagine them as well... now I have to go back to drawing waaahhhffggh gfuck
oh yea i forgot the songs like a retard mb
everlong foo fighters, [censored] allie x (obviously), medication garbage, cookie dough 4dbling (cs ur swag af.. in a really gay way tho), thinking of you a perfect circle, style 2hollis, she makes pretty words sound dirty ptv, je ne sais quoi boycomma, literally any lil peep (beamer boy), xavier wulf or black kray song, risk + CMND/CTRL deftones, weird fishes/arpeggi + punchdrunk lovesick singalong radiohead, flowers of flesh and blood + sleepy towns and cemeteries + coma baby. there’s more but i already sent you a days worth of my thoughts. this is all to say that ur pretty cool iguess 
okay so anyways i was at the gym contemplating what lovely things to say to you today in my anonymity. there’s so much to say but i swear my mind goes totally blank when i’m trying to be serious. just know i’m yearning and i’m yearning hard for YOU… you are MINE… YOU ARE MINE (like that one audio). uhm but to kick this off i just wanted to remind you how much i adore you. you make me want to say all of the cheesy, stupid (schtewpid) things that i think all of the time. i love you so purely its genuinely sick to me. every time you talk to me i feel like god really blessed me and that i don’t deserve this. maybe i don’t deserve you, but i’ll take you forever and ever 😌😌. you have no choice within this btw.. your word to me is like gospel honestly, i haven’t believed in god for a very long time but i think you might be the closest to, in the biblical sense of being lovely and holy. you make me feel everything i think I should feel towards someone i love. i never thought id be one of these types of people but here we are and you inflicted this upon me (in a good way). i always go back and read the nice things you say to me, the sweet things that slip through between conversations. it’s just a natural love for one another i didn’t think was possible. you’re incredible, and everything to me. also you’re very handsome with your rodger taylor haircut.. that one is getting framed next. seriously i worship u start a cult and i will join. thanks for the cute reply.. this is me one upping you. hawhawhaw get owned. secret admirer btw again.. ya 
u r so cute btw. my sister kept hitting my shoulder bc i kept going “he’s so fucking kawaii” while staring at your photo. i am so lucky to have my very own ups store valentine gf.. smirks
who the fucvk is sending these weird messages.. uh? is this thing on? 
idk but please stomp him out for me im very uncomfortable 
i hav come to say that i hate you. i hate you so Much ythat i actually would like towrap my arms around you and squeeze. and probably Lick you too. Could you tell me what you smell liek. Wow im getting super angry thinking about this. anyways do you like my 1000 messages. I like sending these the font you made your ATA is really cool to type with. I feel like Im on a typewriter. aaaaaaahhhh Aaaahahhh Aaaaah hey can You tell me allthe things Youi like about me because this is anonymous.. you dont know who thsi is. This white screen is burning my eyes. Yiu are so cute to me... i am ur secret admirer. Yep. I like your hair and your eyes and your voice and the way it lilts when you're trying not to laughj. I like the way you talk and how funny you are but you can be serious too. I like That you always make me feel safe and happy even if we Aren't talking for a second you always come back and make it better. You make me feel Sick in a good way. Uiuuiuiuiuiuiuiui. There's much more to say But i'll say it Later. 
your text so cute hello little hamster. anyways Hi i’m happy to be speaking with you. sometimes i want to squish your ribs in until they crack because you make me overwhelmingly something emotional. anyways i liek you i guess sometimes.. tch. also i was lying ab being irritated you were in my dream i actually like seeing you there so im not lonely. also the train is realy cold my hands r shaking please fix this